I woke up in a bed in the rental apartment in Wroclaw. It was 2007 and I was a twenty-one years old directing student at a Film Academy. That morning was unlike any other morning in my life… a hangover after Saturday night… and great fear, fear of… everything. I was terrified by the sounds of rain outside the window, the blue colour of the walls, the texture of the quilt, and the silence around me. Hangover, I thought, and closed my eyes to sleep it off. The next day the hangover was gone… but the fear remained. Fear, as it turned out later, was diagnosed as a neurosis. It was fear that eventually drove me to my bottom. I had no place to live and generally had no desire to live. Breakthrough came nine years later. It was the moment when I realised if I have the power to go down, I have the power in direct proportion – to go up. So, I did. I became interested in my body mechanics: how the brain and human body work, and what the mind is. That is how I came across the Kaizen methodology and that was the beginning of the path I am still following today.
When writing this article, I am sitting with my laptop open, a cup of my favourite coffee, and I am surrounded by books about neuroscience, biology, physics, Kaizen methodology, and NVC (Non-violent Communication). I can hear the birds singing, feel the warm sun, and, as I call it, the breath of the island of Madeira – my place on earth (so far;)). The Kaizen methodology focuses on small steps, on striving for changes at an individual pace and the goal becomes achievable. Kaizen is a tool that allows you to create your life. Imagine that you have had a dream in your head for many years, e.g., that you want to meet someone, that you want to change your job, but you are afraid of it. Imagine being able to do each of these things non-invasively… without much pain or drama. All you have to do is be consistent in your Kaizen practice and you have to put in the mental effort. Well, let’s be honest. nothing will happen in life and nature without effort.
In the Kaizen methodology I developed, there is yet another word: Heart… Kaizen Serca (Heart) – why? Well, it wasn’t just Kaizen that was my lifeline. Psychotherapy was also incredibly helpful and crucial. During psychotherapy, I learned the term NVC – Nonviolent Communication. It was such a great discovery that I almost fell off my chair in the psychotherapist’s office. That was it! The missing piece. NVC – Nonviolent Communication, in a nutshell, is an empathic form of communication with another person, to understand yourself and others. It allows resolving conflicts between people not on the model of compromises, where two parties have to give up something to reach an agreement. NVC is a conflict resolution method where two parties come to an agreement with fully satisfied needs. It is extremely important to understand that an empathic approach to yourself and other people is necessary to improve the quality of our lives. In the present world condition, it is extremely needed.
The merger of Kaizen and NVC gave birth to Kaizen Serca (Kaizen of Heart). I practise Kaizen Serca in my everyday life. I also go out with this methodology to anyone who wants to change their lives. I run individual online sessions and workshops. I am glad to observe the people I helped, and how they changed their lives for the better, ….. get out of their patterns, and achieve their goals. It gives me wings. More and more people, after meeting me and learning Kaizen Serca, perceive themselves and the world in a more empathetic and humanistic way. They notice their own and other people’s needs, know how to react and recognize emotions – and most importantly, know what to do with them, what they mean, and what signals they are.
I dream of a world full of empathy, and lack of judgment towards myself and other people. A world where different views are a cultural, social, and individual enrichment and not a field for aggressive conflicts and division. A world where we are not afraid of making mistakes and we reach our goals slowly, in small steps, understanding ourselves and the people around us. Many people who work with me are doing incredible progress and this fills me with optimism. I hope that by reading this article, you will also be interested in an empathic approach to yourself and others and will open your eyes to all the wonderful things around you and in front of you.
Written By Wojciech Laube
Photography by Wojciech Laube
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